Croatia is set to become the 28th member of the EU on July 1st. The Croatian government, and perhaps the people of Croatia, believe that entering into this illustrious Union will bring about economic prosperity and signify that Croatia is a modern European country. But it looks like their celebratory cheers are turning into grimaces as the sweet nectar of the EU is revealed to be a bitter draught.
The EU, in all its wonderfully totalitarian absurdity, has ruled that a particular brand of Croatian wine, Prosek, cannot be marketed in Europe, Croatia included, as Prosek. The EU has pretty strict laws on marketing of products in Europe. For example, only cheese that actually comes from Cheddar England can be marketed as Cheddar, while only sparkling wine from Champagne France can be called Champagne. This brand of statism isn't news in regard to the EU. But what makes this ruling so absurd is that the EU isn't saying Croatia can't market Prosek as Prosek because there is another wine that is actually from Prosek. No, they are saying the Croatians can't market their Prosek because it is too similar sounding to an Italian wine called Prosecco.
I cannot help but chuckle at the whole affair because of its absurdity, How anyone could confuse Prosek with Prosecco is beyond me, must be that the common plebeian doesn't know how to hear or read the label of origin. Naturally, being that the plebeians are so stupid, and might end up buying the wrong wine even without malfeasance on the part of the wine owner, we must protect them from themselves. I'd feel bad for the Croatians but they had every chance to avoid joining such an ethically bankrupt organization.
Tonight I think I will lift a glass of red wine to the Europeans and the European Union. "To the European Union and her bureaucrats! Worthy successors of the great empires of Rome, the Byzantines, the Franks, Austro-Hungaria, Great Britian, and the great thinkers, explorers, and conquerors of ages long past! What the fuck happened to you?"